It's been a warm winter. It's allowed me to be outside a lot more then previous winters and to be honest I am grateful for that. Winter blue's is a very serious thing on this side of the planet and I don't think I am the only one who suffers from them. It's the worst feeling in the world when all you want to do is run outside and feel warm wind rush over your body. Hell, I don't even need it to be that warm I just need it to be not -20 like it was all February last year.
"A" and I have been able to go for night walks. It's been great to ditch the big winter coats for sweaters and spring jackets. The first shot in this post was taken during one of our only storms this year and to call it a storm is kind of blowing things out of proportion a bit. The giant piles of snow were gone two days later as the weather rose high above seasonal temperatures. To be honest it wasn't even that cold the day I shot these. I was pretty warm in that slinky bohemian top.
Though I did also shoot myself sitting in only a dress in a pile of snow and that may I add was a cold experience. Though it was one that left me laughing ridiculously like a child. I'm not a self portrait kind of person but I am trying to become more used to being in front of the camera these days. It's a confidence I think I should have by now.
These last few months have been filled with ups and downs and nothing days. I call it the point of transition. It plays well with the changing of seasons as well. Spring is just around the corner. My favorite time of the year.
I anticipate getting muddy in my garden and taking pictures of Juby with the blossoming trees and bushes. The smell of wet pavement in my nose as spring brings it's showers and nostalgia in the air. It's what I love.
It's a transition in my life in more then just the season's but some interesting things are happening to "A" and I. The way we are thinking is changing and some of the opportunities we are about to embark on are going to be a big change for us.
We started chatting about kids. It has been exciting and scary to think about growing a little seed inside of me and watching them become this unique little human. As each day passes I want to be a mom more and more and I know there are a few things we have to decide to do before we can take that step but just talking about it and mentally preparing has been a new feeling.
I have spent some time with family in the last few months. Juby is always a delight to be around and I continue trying to capture all her little moments when I am with her. She's my little moon and no one can ever replace her. Being her auntie is such a gift I can't even begin to explain.
As I mentioned our days are mostly nothing days and I pick up my camera and try to photograph some of them. Family days happen too and I enjoy them more now then I think I ever have.
We spend some time at my grandparents house. My grandmother has just returned from Florida and my grandfather from Australia. In their old age they travel a lot and It's impressive. It makes me want to remember to always travel. Seeing them is amazing and my love for them is always felt. They live in the house I grew up in (as we lived with our grandparents as kids.)
I always feel nostalgia when I am there. My old room still has little fragments of me as a teenager. I see carvings in the windowsill and stickers on the light switch. The floor still creeks in all the same places.
I look at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. How many times did I stare into this mirror doing my make-up or fighting to use it with my sister. I was younger then and thinner. Time has aged me but I know I am still young and probably stupid.
My sister and Juby join us and I love the fact that she knows her great grandparents and has a relationship with them. I met my great grandmother in Croatia when she was 96 years old. Her skin was the softest I have ever felt. Every wrinkle on her face told a story and her eyes were clear blue.
Juby, she knows her grandparents. She talks about them. She plays with them. It's a truly lovely bond. It's nice that she enjoys them the way my sisters and I enjoyed them. They shower her with gifts, just like they showered us with gifts and it makes me smile.
Next week I will be 28 years old. I still feel like I am 16 some days. Is this real? How am I getting so old so quickly?